Weddings By Sandy

Posts Tagged ‘officiates’

• Doesn’t read the entire ceremony at rehearsal; but focuses on the elements that involve movement, actions and people
• Makes sure the ceremony site is ready for your wedding (sand, candles or ritual ready to go)
• Can be heard by your guests and knows how to use a microphone and what to do if it doesn’t
• Dresses appropriately
• Arrives early to ensure everything is ready to go and works with your other vendors to create your vision
• Is flexible and personable
• Has fun!
• Helps you to de-stress and relax
• Has a great speaking voice
• Enjoys working with others
• Can provide you with lots and lots of options
• Takes control of the rehearsal and ceremony so you don’t have to

What is the best ritual to include in your ceremony? Well a lot depends on your personality as a couple do you enjoy a lot of sentiment or are you more fun; is your ceremony humorous or religious? There are a lot of factors to consider.
Many brides choose a sand ceremony because they have children and this is a wonderful way to include them in the ceremony. The sand is poured into two containers or more and then the children pour the sand into a bigger container, followed by the bride and the groom, creating a beautiful container of sand art.
Other brides prefer a more traditional route with a candle lighting ceremony, which really can only effectively be done inside. It is always sad when the wind blows out the candle, even with a hurricane lantern you cannot be sure it will stay lit.
What about trying something different, maybe a hand fasting ritual this where the term “tying the knot” comes from or giving each other chocolate kisses to symbolize the sweetness of life? Maybe you can wash away the past and step forth into the future with a clean slate, with a water ceremony.
Whatever ritual you choose, make it meaningful to you and your intended. Your wedding ceremony is something to be cherished and remembered.

Yesterday, I met with Carla David of Carla David Designs. She chatted with me about the keepsake ceremony that I give each client and how I can improve the quality of the paper and the look of the document I put together.

Why is this important and why should I care? For me this is very important. Giving the client something that they can keep, something they can save for a future vow renewal or just something they can look at on their anniversary is a highler level of service that I feel is important. 

Each client receives a special ceremony that is personalized and created just for them.  Even if you select something off my website, it is important to me that it still be special.  So if you are looking for something different, something unique…you can count on your ceremony to become a keepsake you can use later.

By the way, if you are looking for something unique and really special contact Carla David Designs, you will not be sorry, your invitations, table identification tags, programs and other paper pieces will be unforgetable!

To Contact Carla….visit her website or her Showroom.

www.carladaviddesign.com 

 301.300.5996 • 410.988.4630
8170 Maple Lawn Blvd., Suite 170
Fulton, Maryland 20759

Yesterday I had a client meeting and two weddings. In preparation for the two weddings I contacted the bride who had yet to send me her vows and I printed off the second wedding’s keepsake ceremony. In preparation for the client meeting I printed off the contact data form and contract. The bride who needed to send me her vows, finally contacted me, but I never received them from her so I had to print off her ceremony with out the vows.

When I attended my client meeting, the bride was so excited that she signed the contract immediately and said, “You are too popular, I have to book you!” I was stunned! Surprised! All could say was, “thank you!”

After the client meeting, I went to my first wedding. The bride was late, despite the fact that I made it clear I had another wedding (1.5 hours away). In my initial meeting I discuss being late, there is a late clause in my contract and I am always upfront with couples about what I have going on. They were not prepared for their ceremony, obviously not paying attention to what they selected and what I put together for them. I asked them if they rehearsed at all (since they didn’t want a rehearsal) they responded that “no they didn’t rehearse”, even though I sent them a rehearsal guide. I edited the ceremony as I read, so that it would at least make sense. The reader they selected to read COULDN’T READ! She stumbled over the simplest words (I felt embarrassed for her). The groom is going into the Marines in a few weeks and took everything in stride, the bride looked like she was a deer in headlights.

I try to meet with couples, especially couples who choose not to rehearse, about 2 weeks prior to their ceremony and I had done so with this couple. It gives all of us a chance to review the ceremony and to discuss the needs and the technical bits. Her two mothers, apologized over and over, but being late is so disrespectful.. Oh Well..obviously the bride just didn’t care that much.

I made it in time (the as promised time) to the second wedding. This wedding was exactly the opposite, because we had held a rehearsal the night prior, the couple was relaxed, prepared, and very emotional during the ceremony, both cried. It was a beautiful thing. Everything went as planned. Their reader was perfect. I went home and collapsed..I just don’t think I can do better than this.

I try being flexible, but flexible only goes so far..I am not going to be late to someone else’s wedding because one bride is disrespectful to everyone else by being late.

That was my day yesterday, how was your!

I often get asked what is an officiant and what exactly do they do? Officiants, primarily officiate weddings, funerals and other ceremonies; meaning they say the words that unite a couple in marriage or sends an individual to their final resting place. Many Officiants work part-time, very few work full time.   

Most of what an officiant does is behind the scenes, the 10-30 minutes they spend talking in front of an audience is just the finished product of all of the background work that can take an average of 10 hours of work per ceremony.  This can and does include consultations, scheduling appointments, dealing with no-shows of couples and families who are often busy(they forget or are late due to illness or grief); fielding inquiry emails and phone calls to check availability.  Writing the ceremonies can sometimes can take months of work including facilitating couples to write multiple drafts, proof-reads, approvals, updates, modifications, last minute changes, re-approvals, researching special rituals, writing vows and reading choices for weddings and other special ceremonies.  Conducting research for particular non-traditional ceremonies; knowing where to look and of course obtaining the education and experience related to finding the right information.  Ceremony practice time, both privately (on your own; such as reading the ceremony outloud) and at the rehearsal for the wedding.  Travel time to and from the rehearsal and ceremony, waiting and interacting with other vendors before and after the rehearsal and ceremony. Following ceremonies, actions such as signing legal documents like the marriage license and certificates for a variety of ceremonies are also part of the job. Managing the business of officiating, such as advertizing, bridal shows, networking and other things associated with running a business.  Filing the legal documents collected from the ceremonies with the appropriate county office either through mailing or personal delivery.  Financial management such as collecting deposits, fees and payments due; paying fees for legal and insurance coverage.      

Conducting a ceremony requires an officiant to: read the words uniting the couple in marriage; stand the entire time during the ceremony; reassure the nervous bride and groom that everything will be FINE; conduct last-minute free marriage counseling; communicate needs and wants between the couple, the DJ, photographer and other vendors; greets people as they arrive for the wedding; answers questions about “What church do you preach at?”; pins on corsages and ties men’s ties when they have no clue how to do so; carries any and all items that may be needed by the bride/groom such as tissue, aspirin, bug spray, safety pins, stain remover and lots of other items; acts as child psychologist for reluctant or shy children in the wedding party; says “no problem” when the groom forgets the wedding rings and now I have to think of an excuse to delay the ceremony for ten minutes without the bride finding out exactly why; ad-libs as children decide they don’t want to do what the bride/groom wanted them to do; ad-libs as the weather decides not to cooperate; uses a “big voice” when the audio equipment does not cooperate; gets to see the love and joy on the bride and groom’s faces as they repeat their vows to each other; gets to say, “I now pronounce you husband and wife”; gets hugs from bride and groom before leaving.  Finally, the personal sacrifices–time lost with significant others on the weekends.  Typically officiate work is on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. 

The most important part:

Your Officiate is a consummate professional without which there would be no marriage.
It is the least expensive cost in a typical wedding, yet the only required part.
You can have a wedding without flowers, DJ, expensive dresses and fancy food.  You can’t have a legal marriage without an Officiate, Minister, Priest or going to the court house.

An personally, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!!  Officiating weddings!  I’m just saying!